Yep. It’s so quiet. Both girls are at a sleepover for the second week in a row and are going again next week. So I’m sitting here telling myself it’s ok whilst I write this welcome distraction.
Most people who know me, know that I hate being away from P & I, as annoying as they can be they make me who I am. I’m sat here not knowing what to do this myself, even washing up without I attached to my leg is weird. Then it hit me.. Who the fuck am I?
I have no idea who I even am anymore to the point that I’m forcing myself to just sit here and not to just take the five-minute walk to my mums to get the girls, but they’re fine. They’re making cakes. It’s ok.
That’s what I keep telling myself anyway! So sitting here eating my cornflakes, watching my guilty pleasure; Ex on the beach, in my pyjamas, it dawned on me.
I’m just a mum and it’s ok.
Like honestly it is. I’m still me but that me is a mum and I love it! I couldn’t imagine being anyone else. Not having little gremlins to run around with all morning isn’t my idea of fun. I love spending time with G and last night (DATE NIGHT) was amazing but I’d love to have woken up to my smalls. I don’t do being alone. I mean sometimes you do need a break, but I’m happy with a few hours! P loves staying out. She’s outgoing and confident but little I isn’t so keen. She’d much rather come home at night and so would I.
So the whole point of this drawn out post; apart from distracting me, is to say that it’s ok mums! You’re still you. It’s ok to not know what to do when they’re not here. It’s ok to just enjoy them being around.
It’s Ok. I promise.